Hi guys, I have been very busy for the past month or so, I bought my first house so needless to say time has been tight, but I’m back at it! Here we go!

1. You can’t maintain or hold eye contact for longer than a second or two.  Don’t use fleeting glances.  Summon up some courage and look women directly in the eyes when you speak with them.  You’ll find yourself making better connections with people when you do this.

2. You carry yourself with a submissive or awkward posture making you look like a huge tool.  Don’t forget – always walk with your shoulders back, chest up, and eyes forward.

3. You give away all your power.  What does this mean?  This means that you avoid taking control of situations and doing what you want.  It means not always being agreeable if you don’t approve or want to do something.  It means constantly seeking approval and doing what you hope she thinks is acceptable.

4.  A BIG sign you are a tool is you always nervously fidget with something, whether it be your hands, a marker, a pencil whatever.  Practice the discipline of simply holding your arms at your sides or whatever place you find comfortable.

5. You always try to follow the crowd and do what everyone else is doing because you’re afraid people may think ill of you.  If you want to drive a volvo, do it! If you want to get a tattoo, do it! Don’t worry about other people think.

6. You’re deathly afraid of a women being offended by you, so you tend to only do and say “in the box” stuff like “you’re pretty, you will you go out with me sometime?” rather than “hey, you seem like you might be more than just another pretty face…I’m about to go grab a bite, would you like to join me?”

7. You act overly macho and cocky to the point of annoyance – but you don’t know it.  A good sign that you’re doing this is people often roll their eyes when you speak.

8. You wear a ton of wacky jewelery.  I know a lot people subscribe to the Mystery Method way of peacocking, but I personally think looking like you shop at hot topic (if you’re not 16) is a no-no if you want to be taken seriously. This isn’t the early 90′s zer0 cool

9. You dress like a slob and have bad manners.  Clean your clothes, have them ironed or dry cleaned and don’t eat with your mouth open.  Also, brush and floss your teeth.

10. You’re obsessed with sports and it’s the only thing you talk about during the week and the only thing you watch during the weekend.  Broaden your interests, plus most women aren’t into it.

11. You hand out way too many compliments all the time.  They are more valuable the less you give them.

12. You fart and belch in public and don’t see a problem with it.

13. When you go out you can’t control your alcohol intake and end up getting shit faced all the time, every time – another sign you are a tool

14. In the gym you stare at yourself in the mirror and flex your muscles.

15. You lie all the time and have no integrity.

-Gary

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15 Signs You Are A Tool is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

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Ever meet a woman, who at first you think is just another pretty face, but the more you get to know her and the more time you spend with her the more that initial attraction quickly grew into an intense affection as you became friends?

Then as you find yourself spending even more time with her, you started to become more and more insecure? Sound familiar?

We’ve all been there. You are not alone.

You were just dying to know if she felt the same way about you as you did about her – yet you were still clearly in the dreaded friend zone.

At times you may have tried to illicit a reaction out of her when you told her how important she was to you to no avail.

She would occasionally give you hug or hold your hand, but not in the way you want her too. She was still at the end of the day – your friend.

The more insecure you felt about your feelings, the more scared you became of making a move on her and potentially messing up the friendship. Then you realized the only way she would ever know your “true” feelings was to sit her down and tell her.

Then shortly after telling her you got the inevitable rejection. “Thanks, that was really sweet…but I wouldn’t want to mess up our great friendship, I have to get going…I’ll talk to you later”  This type of feeling dump is an instant turn off with most women!

Maybe she was just afraid of sharing her true feelings as well? The thought “Maybe I wasn’t clear enough runs through your head?”

You had to be with her. To make sure she really understood your feelings you painstakingly wrote her a poem really digging deep and pulling out all your feelings for her unfiltered.

Then shockingly she starts to avoid you and doesn’t return your calls or texts. If you’re lucky, after a few weeks or a month she may have tried to reconnect your friendship if you can get over her.

Knowledge is power. If you knew what I’ve been teaching you already, you never would have gone about turning your friend into a partner in such a pussy way, not to mention sabotage a great friendship.

If a woman isn’t already attracted to you, any traditional courting efforts (flowers, poems, expensive dinners, etc) will only PUSH her further from you. 

Doing “nice guy” stuff for a woman that isn’t attracted to you only makes the situation worse. I know it sucks, but there is a right and a wrong way of attracting woman you’re interested in. This story is how you turn off women instantly. Keep the feelings to yourself or don’t let it get to that point!  Make a move early on and stay out of the friend zone entirely.

How To Not Turn Off Women Instantly

• Keep things light
• No flowers
• No chocolates
• No poems
• No love songs
• No “we need to talk” type conversations
• Don’t call or text her 7 times a day
• Don’t ask if she likes you

Learn how to make her attracted to you from the beginning. Learn how to read her positive signals. Learn to read her body language. Learn how to communicate with women on a level that shows you “get it.” Stay tuned and I will teach you.

-Gary

If you like what you’re reading here, check out my eBook for more content that will NEVER be posted on my blog.

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Turn Off Women Instantly is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

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1. Don’t Date Your Friends

What they say is true, nice guys always finish last.  The cocky, humorous, jackass will of course never have a problem with picking up women.  Why is this true?

Here are three ways being a “nice guy” will kill your chances of attracting women.

1. You appear boring. Nice guys are usually way too quiet, spineless, and flat out wimps.  They come across as weak and lacking confidence – this is doom when trying to attract women.  You may be the shoulder to cry on, but you will never get ass if you don’t change your ways.

2. You’re always available. Nice guys will do whatever it takes when you need it to make you happy at any whim.  Women are not attracted to things that are very available. Why do women love jewelry? Because it’s hard to acquire.  Think of yourself the same way.  Women are attracted to men who are not always readily available.

3. You’re awkward. Nice guys tend to not be described as “smooth talkers.”  They tend to be way too socially awkward for women to even be remotely interested in them.  They are very self-conscious, avoid risk taking, and play it way too safe for women to find attractive.

Stop being so nice, stop seeking female approval, stop being the shoulder to cry on.

-Gary

If you like what you’re reading here, check out my eBook for more content that will NEVER be posted on my blog.

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Why You Should Avoid Being A “Nice Guy” is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

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1. Why Shy Guys Can’t Get Girls
2. How To Dismantle Approach Anxiety
3. How To Not Be Socially Awkward

Dating and meeting women for shy men can be quite a harrowing experience.  You may feel like you will never find a date while your friends whip through girlfriend after girlfriend.

Shy guys tend to enjoy explaining to everyone how amazingly nice they really are and how well they would care for a girl if they had one.  In the game of dating, overly nice guys usually finish dead last.

First of all stop saying that you’re shy and nice all the time.  It makes you look like a wimp.  Women aren’t going to wait for you to stop being shy and make the first move, from approaching to the first kiss.  If you can’t get over your shyness you may never get a long term girlfriend.

Being shy and un-assertive also makes you appear more feminine and less masculine – not good.  It’s generally acceptable for a woman to get away with being shy, but it unfortunately doesn’t work for guys when it comes to attracting high quality women. If she can feel like she can walk all over you there will be no attraction.

No one is going to do the approaching women, talking to women, and making first moves for you.  You’re going to have to crack the shell man.  It makes you look weak.  To attract women, you need to appear dominant and strong.  Not just physically, I mean mentally, socially, and emotionally.  A woman needs to know she can count on you and a shy guy doesn’t project that.

-Gary

If you like what you’re reading here, check out my eBook for more content that will NEVER be posted on my blog.

Click Here to Learn More About the eBook

Why Shy Guys Can’t Get Girls is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

Related posts:

1. Why You Should Avoid Being A “Nice Guy”
2. How To Dismantle Approach Anxiety
3. Talking To New Women

From Urban Dictionary

If you often have trouble creating close and meaningful relationships with friends or girls you meet, you may be doing some things that make you appear socially awkward. Here are some ways to not be socially awkward.

1. Nothing is more awkward than a nervous, shy, and un-friendly person.  Adopt a sunny, (at least semi) extroverted outlook and befriend the world around you.  Make small talk (BS innocuous questions like “hows the weather?”)  with the people you see everyday. Slow down your gestures and move deliberately.

2. Learn how to be funny in a way that is actually funny. When you crack a joke, and no one laughs, just kind of looks at you funny, or gets pissed off, it’s probably time to work on this aspect of your game. Being funny and having a sense of humor is something that can be learned.

3. Embrace the gaps of silence in conversation. It’s perfectly normal to not be talking at all times. Being comfortable with the natural gaps in conversation is a big sign of a self-assured and high confidence person.

4. Avoid talking about anything too sexually crude, especially if it’s a woman you just started seeing. Remember, when your out on a date your not in the locker room or Barrens chat.

5. Avoid sharing stories that you should probably keep to yourself, like that time you screamed like a girl crapped yourself when you watch The Ring.

6. Don’t ask people questions that will put them on the spot or make them uncomfortable when you don’t know them well. When someone is with you, they want to remember having fun with you, not stress and weird questions.  If there is something you want to ask that you wouldn’t want to be asked, don’t ask it.

-Gary

If you like what you’re reading here, check out my eBook for more content that will NEVER be posted on my blog.

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How To Not Be Socially Awkward is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

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1. How To Have A Great Conversation
2. Talking To New Women
3. How To Call A Woman To Ask Her Out

When most guys think about approaching a woman they tend to make nervous movements, speak rapidly, freeze up, or explode into a pile of nerves leading to rejection.  Usually, the hotter the girl the higher the nervous factor. There are a few simple and easy ways to dismantle your approach anxiety.

A good way to dismantle this type of thinking is to remember that on the inside whether she’s hot, average, or ugly, fat, skinny, etc we’re all the same anatomically (mostly). Another way to shed some anxiety is to immediately look for her flaws to help you realize she isn’t perfect either. See my previous entry Chop Down The Pedestal for more on this subject.

This will help you deal with being rejected as not every woman you talk too is going to like you, no matter what you do. It will help reduce how much you feel like you lost or failed. Remember, she isn’t any more valuable than YOU are, so if she gave you the cold shoulder, it’s her loss.

You have to come from a place of feeling like you are the most important person in your world. Anyone else who is allowed into your world should feel privileged to know you. Also, the more you do it, the less you will feel like you have lost over time.  Turn approaching women into a game, or think of it a social experiment until you get good at it, detach yourself from any negative emotions you may have experienced before from rejection.

Action Plan: Go to a public place like a mall and approach 10 women. We’re not trying to get phone numbers, just getting comfortable speaking to random women and coming up to them cold. This is what you do make eye contact and say “hey, you are absolutely gorgeous and I had to stop you to tell you…<she replies> I have to get going, unfortunately tight on time” wave and leave. Very simple, just give a compliment and have some fun with it. Do it and let me know how it goes.

-Gary

If you like what you’re reading here, check out my eBook for more content that will NEVER be posted on my blog.

Click Here to Learn More About the eBook

How To Dismantle Approach Anxiety is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

Related posts:

1. 3 Tips To Improve Your Approach
2. How To Get Phone Numbers In Coffee Shops
3. Why Shy Guys Can’t Get Girls

Asking out a good friend is not a good idea. It can be extremely awkward for the receiving party and possibly sabotage the existing relationship.

You may be thinking, “you know… we have so much fun together and she would be perfect for me. We have the same friends, I know her parents, and I know that ‘The Notebook’ turns on the water works.”

If you unveil your emotions or “true feelings” to your friend it will most likely result in ruining the friendship and her avoiding you for a while. Hopefully she will forget shortly and your now strained friendship can resume.

If the foundation of the relationship is not based in a sexual way then the emotional unveiling will not work. The vibe of your friendship will have forever changed, even if she assures you after rejecting you that it won’t.

It may sound like I am being negative, but I am only trying to prevent you from damaging a potential life long friendship. From past experience and talking to other women who have gone through this – it’s a bad idea.

What you need to do:

1. Don’t talk about your emotions to anyone on this subject, don’t give it life..keep that crap inside.

2. Go to a website like http://www.plentyoffish.com/ and check out 20 hot single girls to remind you that there are in fact other single women who are looking and available.

3. Be glad you have a great friend and leave it at that

-Gary

If you like what you’re reading here, check out my eBook for more content that will NEVER be posted on my blog.

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Don’t Date Your Friends is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

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2. Four Fantastic First Date Locations
3. Turn Off Women Instantly

Tact is a skill that anyone can learn. It is the ability to be sensitive to the feelings and internal dialogue of other people. If you have it, it can give you a significant edge when it comes to meeting and attracting women. If you don’t, your relationships with everyone are probably more strained than they should be, or hardly exist at all.

People who have mastered tact naturally know what is going on in the minds of others. Sensing this, they can then respond in a way that influences people in a positive way. You have to be careful with this though, employing too much tact can make you look like a wimp. There has to be a fine balance between using tact and maintaining that little edginess women love.

Example: “Nice dress…”(then wink & smile)

The “Nice dress” portion of this allows you to check her out without being creepy. You could probably get away with one “up and down” but any more than that or excessive staring would be acting without tact. Don’t get greedy with your eyes. The wink is flirtatious and helps you stand out from the droves of guys who simply drop compliments left and right and hoping for the best.

The amount of tact you use should be based on the person you are talking too. It requires awareness and the ability to change your behavior based on the way the person you are speaking with reacts to you.

For example, If you’re being too sexually aggressive or not quite aggressive enough with a woman you have just started seeing, you should keep your senses tuned to the way she is reacting to your advances or she may be encouraging them if you’re not being aggressive enough. If she suddenly seems defensive realize you should lay off and take a couple steps back. If she starts allowing you into her “comfort zone” or she moves into yours and you do nothing about it, it will signal to her you’re not attracted to her.

High Amounts of Tact

People with high amounts of tact are polite, courteous, and select their words carefully. Listening is key. They know what people say and what they mean. Too much tact can make you look dorky and boring. Balance is key, so have tact but still be direct and to the point. It’s ok to risk upsetting people occasionally.

Low Amounts of Tact

People with low levels of tact don’t shy from saying or doing exactly what it is they are thinking. They are often perceived as blunt, rude, or too aggressive. People may find this type of person a bit intimidating.

For example, a guy with low levels of tact would look a woman up and down 25 times during their conversation and totally creep her out because he thinks shes hot. Not the way to do it.

Balance Is Key

How To Have Tact is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

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This will kill any remnants of attraction she may have felt for you

When a woman feels like she has you in the palm of her hand, there is no need for her to vie for your attention. The game will be over before it started and that’s boring. Boredom is the enemy.

There is a reason why the guys who know what they’re doing when first talking to a group of girls totally ignore the one girl they are actually interested in. Think about it. First, observe that by ignoring the woman they are interested in they are doing the opposite of putting her on a pedestal. This is a psychological tactic that will inject curiosity, give you a mysterious air, and best of all make her feel like she will have to work to get your attention. This is more effective on hotter women as they are used to being drooled on by every guy who’s eyeballs give her the up and down. Nice, now the tables are turned.  Rather than being the pursuer, you may now be the perused.

Men who put women on a pedastel will be dominated and controlled like a boring puppet. Do the opposite, but don’t be a jackass either.

-Gary

If you like what you’re reading here, check out my eBook for more content that will NEVER be posted on my blog.

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Chop Down The Pedastel is a post from: The Geeks Guide To Dating Blog

Related posts:

1. How To Dismantle Approach Anxiety
2. Why You Should Avoid Being A “Nice Guy”
3. How To Have Tact